JUSTIN,
age: 13
My dad picked me up from a classmate’s party last weekend
and found out there was marijuana there. I told him I wasn’t
smoking it, but now he won’t let me go to any more parties.
This one event has ruined my social life.
JARED, Dad
Justin is only in the 7th grade and he has already been exposed
to drug use. This really worries me. I’ve asked him if he’s
ever tried smoking marijuana and he says no but I’m not sure
if I can trust him where other kids are smoking it. How can I be
sure he won’t try anything?
GUIDANCE COUSELOR:
Justin, sounds like your social life isn’t ruined. Chances
are you and your dad can come up with some sort of compromise. For
many reasons, it’s really not a good idea to be at a party
where drugs are being used. Drugs cause people to change their behavior
in potentially dangerous and irresponsible ways. It has been known
that people could “plant” drugs on others to avoid punishment
or arrest. Some people become violent when using drugs and do things
to hurt themselves or others. You could also become guilty by association.
Basically it is a bad scene and it is smart to avoid. If you are
somewhere in the future where drugs are being used, call you dad
to come and pick you up immediately.
Jared, Unfortunately 7th grade isn’t surprisingly early for
kids to be exposed to drug use. Make sure you speak to Justin about
the many dangers of drugs and alcohol. If you don’t, he’ll
get his information elsewhere and that could be dangerous. It’s
not just one conversation, but rather constantly integrating your
values and anti-drug message through your daily communication with
your son. There aren’t any guarantees that kids will respond
to their parents’ wishes when it comes to difficult choices
in adolescence. You must always know his whereabouts and the company
he keeps when he’s not with you. Keep open and honest communication
with him. Make a clear plan so he can always get in touch with you
if he needs to be picked up. Make sure he knows he can always come
to you to talk, even if he’s made a mistake.
Louise
Hajjar Diamond has been a guidance counselor for twelve
years. She is also a freelance writer and mother of two.